Talking To Your Teenage Son About His Cheating Ways

Every parent wants to raise their son to be a mature, responsible young man.  Men who are considerate and loyal.  For the most part, of our sons will end up that way, eventually in time.  However, in the meantime, they will make a lot of mistakes.  One of those mistakes likely involves breaking a few hearts along the way. 

A large number of teenage boys “play the field” behind the backs of their devoted girlfriends.  As much as you don’t want to know or admit it, your own son may be among them.  But, what to do if and when you learn this important, yet heartbreaking piece of information?  If you discover that your son is a player per say, there are a few ways you can go about handling the situation.  A few of these ways are highlighted below for your convenience.

One approach is to just stay out of the situation completely.  Since all teenage relationships are basically learning experiences, you should allow them to learn.  There are a number of benefits to giving him the freedom to make his own mistakes.  If you believe this way of thinking, you may just want to ignore the situation.  With that said, if you suspect that your son might be jeopardizing his own health and safety or the health and safety of others by cheating, you may want to deal with the problem head-on.

Putting things into perspective for your son is another approach that you can and may want to take.  What you can do is appeal to your son’s own sense of decency.  Ask him to imagine how he would feel if someone broke his heart and trust in that same way.  As a parent, you may be surprised just how effective this approach is.  Many times, all it takes is a gentle and respectable reminder that they are not the only people in the world who have feelings and experience hurt and pain.

Discuss the consequences with your son.  The consequences of cheating may seem like common sense to us, but to a teenager who lives in the moment, these ideas are fleeting, at best.  Your son may not even have considered the idea of losing the friendship of a girl he cares about, developing a reputation that may impact and prevent future relationships, and so forth.

If you are worried about seeming over protective or appearing as the overbearing parent, you may want to take the “cool” approach to the situation.  Most teenage boys are fueled by the approval of their peers.  This means that looking “cool” to their friends is very important.  You can and should try to convince your son that he doesn’t need multiple girlfriends to fit in or just because everyone else thinks that it is cool to cheat. 

By implementing a few of the above mentioned steps, you may be able to help your cheating teenage son change his ways.  However, even if you are completely unsuccessful in getting your son to stop his cheating, the important message is still fresh in his mind.  It is likely that he will, one day, meet that special someone who leaves him with the urge to stay faithful.  Until then, it is your job, as the parent, to support him as best you can even while voicing your displeasures. 



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